Beautiful mystery

I feel tired. Weary. It is bone-deep and my spirit wanes. Ever been there – when all you want to do is curl up in bed and sleep. Well, that’s me, and I did just that.

My usual thinking self asked, “why?” Practically I can point to work, to my responsibility as a parent, a daughter and the personal will to achieve as possible causes.

Intuitively however I know these are not the reason. Frankly, I don’t know why. And I don’t need to know why. This weariness is a sign, of change, of transition, of transformation, perhaps. It is incumbent upon me to put the thinker/problem-solver me to rest for now, and call upon the nurturer, the carer who says “go easy” and the spiritual one who whispers “time will tell”.

There is much I would like to do, much to accomplish, much I ought to do… But there is no need.

There is nothing that cannot be put down or pushed back a little. Slow is necessary in this fast-paced on-demand world. Time and tide waits for no one, I agree and the presumption is “no one” is indeed in the race with time and tide. Slow is relative. We can step off the tracks, or choose a different race, or not even be in the stadium. We can have space. If only for a while.

What I can be is to be present in this moment; and within each moment to make the best decision I can. To be mindful to do so with kindness and compassion, for myself and those whom I come into contact. If all I can do in the moment is to “do no harm” and if that is all there is, I am grateful.

 

As I make my slow pilgrimage through the world, a certain sense of beautiful mystery seems to gather and grow. ~ A C Benson

 

~ FlorenceT

 

© 2017 FlorenceT Copyright reserved. The author asserts her moral and legal rights over this work.

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2 thoughts on “Beautiful mystery

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  1. Hi FlorenceT, this reminds me of Kabat-Zinn’s ‘dying on purpose’ ideas about mindfulness and focus, but what I want to share is that I too am weary, and in transition- it’s a learning process for me as I’m discovering the importance of space. Sometimes ‘doing no harm’ requires a mindful consideration of also “not coming in contact”- of allowing others the space they need to heal/grow/feel/be mindful in themselves, so that the growing we do apart (by ourselves) can be appreciated mutually when we meet again 🙂
    And this is from goodreads: “By taking a few moments to “die on purpose” to the rush of time while you are still living, you free yourself to have time for the present. By “dying” now in this way, you actually become more alive now.”
    ― Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are

    peace to you

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Walter, I agree… the assurance of one’s own presence is also to see the significance for others to experience the same.
      To be in a space where we can approach another with love and see each other’s beauty… I must admit I don’t always succeed … yet here is awareness and each moment is what it is.
      The change and transition will unfold… and we can only be present and ready to meet them.
      Namaste!

      Like

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