See the signs

“Fiction reveals truth that reality obscures.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

To a younger self…

Well, do you see the signs?

You have been hurt, by others or by circumstances, and you no longer trust. Can you see the walls you’ve built to guard and protect yourself? Can you now see the ways you have avoided being vulnerable? Though you might have wanted to, you did not yet realise the power of vulnerability.

Speak mantras of acceptance, surrender, contentment – all illusions to mask the betrayal, the loss, the emptiness, the yearning…

But you could not escape your soul’s desire – for connection, for intimacy, for a love that is abiding. Where did you seek this? Is it obvious now?

With your boundaries, you took yourself into the space. Within your control, you thought it safe, you could not possibly be vulnerable there.  Ah, but the twist of fate! And too late, you realise no matter how it transpired, you have given something of yourself. The irony is, in the shadow land you found great insights. In the non-judging gaze, you see your beauty and you love yourself a little more. But at what price…?

How does it feel to be vulnerable? Are you running away? Don’t. Perhaps it’s time to say farewell till you are able to face it again, perhaps you are now.

Promising yourself to be true and to live with authenticity, to be self-aware and to be open to life’s changes whatever they may be. Has this come to pass?

Have you grown a little by now, seen through the illusions… finally willing to face it head-on? Will you wake? Have you learnt? You can no longer pretend.

Now, tell me how it is to sit in a place of power and will – to locate yourself where you are first and cherished; where you feel safe and secure; where you will not settle for less.

My dear, do you see the signs?